There are definitely times where I get the sense that someone I am with is holding back and not saying something they would like to express but don’t feel they can or should at that moment. I catch myself doing this as well with one particular person but on occasion with others as well. It happens when I am not certain where I stand with someone or aren’t sure how they will react to what I would like to say. But then later on, I usually wish I had gone ahead and said whatever it was anyway because I’m not sure I will have an opportunity to do so down the road.
I used to keep my thoughts to myself more so than I do now. I have learned from this feeling of regret that I should speak my mind when I have the opportunity, but I still hold back at times. It’s that uncertainty that gets to me every time. I am definitely a pretty straight-forward person who doesn’t play games. You don’t typically have to wonder how I feel about something or someone because I will usually tell you, although I will do it tactfully when necessary. I don’t like having to play guessing games trying to figure out where someone else’s head is at, so I like it when other people are the same way with me and just speak their mind, good or bad.
I understand that there may be other legitimate reasons people hold back expressing their feelings, thoughts, or desires, but I want to eliminate the person feeling uncertain of what I will think or how I will feel as a reason whenever possible. Therefore, I try not to hold back my thoughts most of the time. There are times where I probably say more than I should, but I’d rather err on the side of sharing too much of what I am thinking than not enough. That way people aren’t making their own assumptions about what I am thinking and feeling, which could be incorrect. So while I understand the reasons to keep things to oneself sometimes, I wish certain people wouldn’t hold back nearly as often as they do. That way I won’t need or want to make assumptions about what they are thinking either, or be left wondering.
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